We may not like to be open and there are plenty of reasons for this.

Sometimes it is low self-esteem, though many dominant and strong people are also not open in their nature. In being open to new things, ideas, people and activities you risk your reputation. You’re great at tennis, so you want to play tennis, and if someone invites you to play badminton you may decline just because of your pride. When playing badminton for the first time, you will make mistakes, you will ask silly questions, you will accidentally do stupid things on the court, and you will be defeated. Over our lifetimes we decline so many possibilities because we can’t handle such simple negative emotions. But to get energy from life, we have to become like life, which is a spectrum of things. You may like tennis just much as you like eating meat but to be healthy we need a whole spectrum of vitamins, proteins, fats, etc. Nature doesn’t care if you only like chicken breasts, to stay healthy you need balance, not just your favorite things.

We need to understand the sad consequences of closed off personalities.

Do you think shyness makes us calm and peaceful, or overreactive? Imagine what would happen if someone grabbed a shy person and pushed them through life experiences they usually avoided.

Shy people look calm and peaceful because they have worked very hard to set up their lives in a way that secures them from any possible threats that touch their insecurity.

But when someone tries to take that person and confronts them with some new, spontaneous, possibly dangerous stimuli, this person may completely

Deep inside, there may be a ticking bomb, waiting to explode with fear, anger, and other defense mechanisms. On the outside, they look peaceful, on the inside, they are boiling. So, imagine the constant stress and realize how keeping yourself in this state will lead to mental and physical problems.

But there is one exciting thing about overcoming shyness if health doesn’t motivate you much. Life itself is very rich in possibilities. Every time we go outside, we can talk to someone, go to new places, and gain new knowledge. Every day our friends can propose new ideas and adventures for us to be part of. So, it is enough to say “yes” more often to have an exciting life, there is no need to plan and organize. There is no need to have a better salary or education to fulfill most dreams, it’s enough to say “yes” here and there, every day, to stay connected to the richness of life so that you never again feel like life is happening before your eyes. You are sucked into life and are now an active part of it, the possibilities of new friendships, activities, or job offers will naturally and constantly appear for the rest of your life. This intensity is crucial to staying alive and young.

The more closed we are to the world, the more life is closed to us.

You read a chapter from my book. If you like it read the entire book here

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